#RealTravel: This Couple Met at a Bar in St. Maarten

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Who: Jacquelyn Gillespie and Ben Newman

Where We Fell in Love: St. Maarten

When: November 2013

Relationship Status: In a relationship

(As told by Jacquelyn)

I was in St. Maarten on vacation with five girlfriends. My family has a time share on Simpson Bay. Someone we met there told us we had to go to this bar, the Red Piano, on Monday night because it has live music.

The bar was right around the corner from where we were staying. When we got there it wasn’t that crowded yet. We were just sitting there drinking and hanging out, listening to the live music. I happened to turn around and I saw Ben and another guy across the room with this older couple. I thought, “He’s cute.” Then I started thinking, “What’s the story? Are they brothers? Are those their parents?”

Then I overheard his English accent. That got me — can’t resist that.

The first thing Jacquelyn noticed was how cute Ben was. The second thing was that accent! (Photo: Jacquelyn Gillespie)

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I sometimes tend to be a little bit of an overstarer. I just stared at him. The more I stared, the more intrigued he was, I guess. Then Ben came up to me and asked me to order him a drink because the place was packed and he couldn’t get to the bar. So I ordered him a drink. We got to chatting. We talked about everything: where he was from (England), what he was doing there (traveling around, bartending at another bar in St. Maarten). It was an easy conversation; we were laughing, joking, he met all my friends. Next thing I knew, we were kissing on the dance floor! That was followed by a group trip to McDonald’s and then back to our time share to play cards.

We didn’t see each other the next day, but we emailed back and forth with each other. Then on Wednesday, my girlfriends and I decided to go to Pinel Island, which is one of the islands really close to St. Maarten. Ben emailed me, “What are you guys doing today?” We said we were going to Pinel. And he said, “We’re going to Pinel too!” In my mind I’m going, “Is he really going to Pinel? Or did he just say that because we were going?” I don’t know. He still says no!

So we went to Pinel. That was like our sober meeting where we got to meet one another in the light and outside. I knew what he looked like, but then everyone was like, “I don’t remember him being that cute!” Me and my friends were loud — joking and laughing. I think he felt a little awkward, but we chatted a little bit.

The “sober meeting”: a group outing on Pinel Island (Photo: Jacquelyn Gillespie)

On the last night we all went to this karaoke bar. Ben came and met us. He didn’t sing, but he took videos of us all doing karaoke and making fools of ourselves. I think he was a little nervous, like, “Uh-oh. They’re singing Eminem’s ‘Lose Yourself,’ Biggie’s ‘Juicy,’ and Coolio’s ‘Gangsta’s Paradise.’ What have I gotten myself into?” But it all worked out; he still talked to me after that.

My friends and I left the next day. On the taxi ride home in New York, Ben and I were emailing and started chatting and literally chatted every day since. We became WhatsApp friends and were emailing and FaceTiming. We talked for hours about nothing. We learned so much about one another. The more we learned, the more we were like, “I like you.”

Emails, texts, FaceTime, and several vacations helped this long-distance couple keep things moving. (Photo: Jacquelyn Gillespie)

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I went to visit him back in St. Maarten the next month, December. He came to New York in February and I went back again in April. Long-distance relationships are tough. We had some ups and downs and some struggles at times, knowing that you like someone but you’re not able to see them. It costs money — money we don’t have all the time. You can’t have a relationship based on FaceTime. We knew that the distance couldn’t go on forever and someone had to make a move.

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He moved here May 20th. The best thing about going from long-distance to seeing him every day is actually enjoying our time together and starting our life. When we were apart, we saw each other’s lives through our voices, text messages, and the occasional visit. But now we are actually experiencing our lives together. Ups and downs, of course, but definitely fun and a lot of laughs. Did I mention he’s English?

Together in New York (Photo: Jacquelyn Gillespie)

I don’t think anyone should look to turn a vacation romance into something lasting. I think you have to really focus on the person and if this is someone that interests you. People may ask you, “What are you doing?” But don’t be afraid to try something out and see where it goes, because you never know!

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