Greg Bretz gets the gold medal in McNugget eating

The United States snowboard team is getting the Olympics started early. The first event — Chicken McNugget eating. It's the grossest event in the history of sports, and it's all being documented by snowboarder Louie Vito.

Here are our competitors and spectators before the start of the contest.

And here is our "winner," Greg Bretz, 60 McNuggets later.

Congratulations, I guess, to Bretz. In this event, can you really win?