We Don't Wash the Sheets and Other Confessions of a Hostel Worker

image

What you should know before you book that hostel bed (Corbis Images)

When you’re young and broke, staying in a hostel overseas seems like the best and most exciting way to go. A place to sleep and bathe is a good deal when all you brought with you is your backpack and best friend. It’s all fun and games, right? Well, John, an American working at a popular youth hostel in Paris, anonymously confesses to what really goes on at that cool party hostel in the center of the City of Light.

1. Most hostels double-book. Think you and your friends are about to settle into a quaint, private room where you can walk around in your undies and relax in peace and quiet after a long day of sightseeing? Think again. “We welcomed drop-ins and we pack them in, so you should be prepared to share a room with strangers,” says John. Sometimes they even welcome travelers to “just crash on the floor” for a discounted price. “Watch your step!”

Pro Tip: “Keep valuables on you at all times if there’s strangers in your room,” says John. “But for the most part, enjoy your new friends.”

Related: We Think You’re Stupid and Other Confessions of a B&B Owner

2. It’s cheap for a reason. Guests complain to John about everything, like scratchy towels the size of washcloths, instant coffee, and lack of water pressure in the shower. John says his favorite story is when he overheard one girl complaining she couldn’t get the conditioner out of her hair because the water pressure was too low. “You’re paying 10 bucks a night. You’re getting 10 bucks a night … of plumbing,” John says.

image

Your worst nightmare (Getty Images)

3. They don’t wash the sheets. John admits that his boss would tell him to just shake the sheets out the window, spray some disinfectant on the mattress and make up the bed like everything had been freshly washed and dried. “Turn-around time was sometimes too fast for us to get linens into the laundry. There have been plenty of times I was told to ‘quick-change’ a room.” John says the comforters were never washed. Ever.

Pro Tip: Never use the comforter.

image

(Photo: filipe brandão/Flickr)

4. Employees understand English. “One of the reasons I got hired was to help with translation and tutor French employees in English,” says John. He confessed that no matter how good his French-speaking fellow employees got at English, they chose to pretend they didn’t understand it. “It’s funny watching guests speak “French-lish!”

Related: Confessions of a Fed-Up Flight Attendant—Attack of the Ambien Zombies

image

Your McDonald’s habit will not go unnoticed (Robin Lee/Flickr)

5. They think your taste in food is gross. “Kids came back to the hostel with McDonald’s all the time,” says John. “I get it. It’s cheap and familiar.” His bosses didn’t feel the same way. “They couldn’t understand why they would eat greasy food when the cafe next door served fresh ham and cheese and steak frites at around the same price.” He says there were definitely some “french fry” jokes circulating around the hostel. “They called one kid ‘Micky D’ behind his back all week because a day didn’t go by he didn’t return with something from the fast food chain.

Related: Confessions of a Divemaster—Your Scuba Instructor Wants to Drown You

image

You’re better off exploring on your own rather than paying for a hostel tour (Ian Sampaio/Flickr)

6. Most tours are scams. “It’s an easy way for the hostel to make more money,” says John. “You stick a local with a bunch of kids and take them on a walk around the city.” John says that when travelers check in they are often wheeled and dealed into signing on to at least one tour before they get the keys to their rooms.

image

Free white wine is never a problem (Melissa Wang/Flickr)

7. You’re not special. The bartender gives all the girls free wine. “We had a guy working the bar that always wooed the girls with stories of himself making his way through Paris with a little change in his pocket and a big dream of becoming a screenwriter in his head,” says John. “He was full of it, and the staff made bets on whether or not he’d get the girl to actually make out with him.